Stepping up the training

Past the skin and soft tissue build up.  Now, I'm hitting the posts 1/2 my full power. Down from 100 strikes to 5-10 depending on the kick/strike.  However, I did get to borrow a jigsaw to make the stands sturdier. I've also used Carriage bolts with lock nuts on the bottom instead of just screws.

In addition to that, there was enough in the fund bucket for an adjustable 40lb weight vest, surprisingly equally priced at Dick's Sporting Goods, and 3 pairs of hand held weights at 3lbs, 5lbs, and 8lbs. Since I'm teaching two classes a week now, I'm sure the students will quickly be ready for the hand weights during jumping jacks. I'll be wearing the vest during my daily "commute" to work, starting with 20lbs and moving up from there.

Too bad their large body shield was $50 and junk.  Probably head to Odyssey Martial Arts Supply to check on that soon rather than worry about ordering. Unless they're bloody expensive too. Then, I'll just pay for shipping on a cheaper one.

Fear and the Duality of Self

For most fear is the enemy. To be afraid is to be weak. To show fear is to invite ridicule and ostracism. However, fear is primal. Fear is a genetic response to inherent danger, whether fully consciously understood or not. The feeling of fear is our primary defense mechanism. Therefore, fear can be both a weakness, when overwhelmed by it, or a strength, when used to make educated decisions.

As with all inherent skills and involuntary reactions, fear must be trained and understood before being useful. Becoming fearless is akin to no longer loving life. Becoming continually fearful is to invite danger at every turn. The depth of one's fear is tied to the depth of self-understanding. Without knowing one's skill and ability, one cannot make decisions based on bubbling fears. Without experiencing fear, the fight or flight decision will nearly always end with flight, typically manifest through the freeze reaction.

Fear is the primary cause for dishonesty. Though not all dishonesty results in life endangerment, it does lead to danger. If one is afraid of being perceived as weak, s/he will often take unnecessary risks. Putting on an air of fearlessness, situations can quickly become overwhelmingly dangerous. Thus, clearheadedness  and thought are not the anti-fear, but the ally of fear.

The complexity of self-realization is that without fear, there is no joy. To know one, is to know the other. Fear is healthy and necessary for continued existences. By training oneself how to sense and respond to fear, the quality of life can only improve. Gaining a better understanding of that which is most likely to cause us to act in an inconsistent manner, allows us to better respond in a situation fraught with fear. Fear is terrorizing, but empowering. Fear is demoralizing, but motivating. Fear is cause for moments of weakness, but a source of great strength. This reflects the duality of ourselves, and of existence. Thus, fear is to be embraced and understood, not hidden and denied.