Wassup Playa? It's Shark Attack Time, in ConGRESS!!

If you know the stand-up, read it in that voice:

You can't do your job?
YOU, You can't do YOUR job?
Why?
4 times my salary isn't enough for you?

You have 2 things to do, pass a budget, and make new laws. TWO THINGS! Yet you're not an accountant, and you have someone else basically make that up for you, and you still can't do it. That's it, if you can't do your job at all, neither can I.

Wait, you still get paid?!?

Hook a brother up! I want to not do my job and get paid too. This entitlement thing is pretty nice.

What?
You're against entitlements?

NO, do you know what that word mean?

Anyways, apparently, I can't work today. So, hurry up and figure out how to do your job, so I can get a paycheck.