Loss

I came to a realization last night at work or maybe this morning, whatever. That realization was in the past with almost, if not all, my ex's have attempted at one point or another to make me jealous, however, I am not a jealous person. This has been seen by them as a problem. To me I see jealousy as a lack of trust. So if I don't trust them we aren't really in a committed relationship then are we? Well at least she isn't. I have upon occassion been the guy to make others jealous... quite a bit looking back actually. I am positive that's all I was to Taarna. Although I have also been a transition guy, which at times feels good to get them out of the bad spot. Amber, although I have no idea what has happen to her I know that I got her away from wanna be gangbanger guy who is now in jail. Marilyn - married no longer fretting over years past relationships, but I think for a bit I was an attempt to reopen that relationship as I was flaunted around her ex, but he is one of few Christians that is okay with me. That was a good time at that church they are one of very few churches I can stand. I remember Amy, that's just humor on how dumb I was. Eh BONUS! That will always make Jon Kelly and myself smile. I believe she's married too. Another transition time. Crazy. Maybe one day I can find someone who doesn't need drama. One must be content to say this is what I want, instead of attempting to get that reaction by breeching trust. Nothing like them attempting to rationlize their actions to brighten my day either. Another quality I need in a woman is that she's not a girl, she will be stand up about what she does and just leave it at that not I did but you might have or could have or you did or it's not as bad as.. or any number of other b.s. excuses. Well off to see those who cheer me up and are forgivable for they are truly youthful and don't claim to be adults.